The Goal of Professional Relationships - To be like Someone or be Among Many?

Depending on the time I arrive at my office, I can predict with great accuracy the activity that will occur between the time I step out of my car and arrive at my desk. One of my favorites occurs every morning at 7:10. I know this explicitly because I try to arrive before 7a most mornings, but my children often have different designs on how their old man should be using his morning time.

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Every morning at 7:10, a mismatched duo, assumed by me to be a boss and an underling (perhaps 3 or more rungs down the proverbial ladder) emerge from the office building so that the boss can enjoy the first of his many daily smoke breaks. Tagging along with him is his inferior, who is constantly yapping about this or that – all with an eagerness and conviction that would lead me to believe that he proactively scripts his morning discussion material the night before.

The boss always looks utterly disinterested, but this does not dissuade his suitor from lavishing him with fables and tales of the incredible world of home health benefits, bastardized accounts of local sporting events, or opinions on world events that may have been gleaned from The Onion – or worse, Nancy Pelosi’s personal blog. The scene inevitably plays out with the intensity of a conversation regarding shrimp recipes between Bubba and Lt. Dan.

Watching this interaction occur everyday brings to mind a relationship that is:

1 part Spike the bulldog and his buddy/son Tyke on Tom and Jerry

1 part Al and Peg Bundy

1 part Balki and Cousin Lenny

1 part Snidely Whiplash and Muttley

This fascinates and scares me for one main reason. I hope to never find myself in this Groundhog Day scenario where I have a scripted start, middle and end to my day. That is why I like this industry, and the curveballs heaved my way on a daily basis. I see others who are stuck in situations like this, mired in daily reports, weekly calls, monthly recaps and annual reviews - and feel for them.

In the Bizarro world of the boss and his minion – it is clear to the outside observer that the boss is miserable with his situation. The underling does not know that what he aspires to be is more miserable than his Ed Grimley-esque existence. Moving up to boss status will not bring the fame and fortune of a Pat Sajak, but more likely an existence as grim as that of Tom Hanks’ in the first half of Joe vs. The Volcano.

That is the beauty of the search industry. We get to make new people love us every day. We can’t rehearse a script geared at one individual, because that would alienate the other 100 people we interact with in a given 10 hour stretch. If my test subjects were represented by the relationship inherent between Gordon Gecko and Bud Fox, I would rather live the life of Doug and Steve Butabi (obscure reference). Think about it, they got to hang out with Richard Greico.

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