Now, Is that Appropriate Language?

I may be shaking a few trees today. Or stirring a few pots. Or even whacking a few beehives with a big, fat stick. But guess what? I'm not afraid. Like the Wright Brothers, I'm letting it fly.

I can't help it..., I have held it in long enough. As a matter of fact, it is ready to bust out of me like Pillsbury Biscuit dough when it pops out of the can. While it is true that I am a firm believer that words only have the power you give them, and while I might not be the first one to say or even scream a swear word or two (when I know my audience and they know me), I find it completely abhorrent to let your favorite one-syllable shocker loose in writing whenever your little ol' heart desires.

I am supposing that it is alright for me to be of this opinion and share it loud and clear since there are those that think I am alright with the vulgarities that fly through certain posts. This "style" of writing isn't authentic. It certainly isn't respectful. It really doesn't take much thought or creativity to riddle a post with some poorly chosen words. And it degrades most professionals that work within this so-called profession that that we love. It just really isn't very fetching. I know I'm not Cinderella at the ball, but I really don't want to kill the music at the dance before the Prince is smitten.

Perhaps you think it's cool to write this way or even way cool to read. But does your client or your boss? What about that potential client or potential boss? I know, I know: it's real, it's genuine. Maybe, but would your mother want to read it? I suppose there are some moms that would be ok with it. And how cool is that.., because words only have the power that you personally give them - and yes, I know I already gave that argument. That's kind of the point. There really is no valid argument for the use of foul language in a post or online discussion.

Really, what are you? In eighth grade? Use your words, big words, for pity's sake (and I do mean pity.) Would you tell a client to pay their f-in invoice? Would you litter a proposal or contract agreement with four-letter gems, allowing a potential client to see the "real you," the bona fide you? Because that is business in the new millennium. For I do what I want, gosh darn it.

Again, I am not perfect and given the right circumstance, I will say almost any swear word. Didja hear me? I'm not claiming to be anything other than someone who cares about my audience. All of my audience. Especially given the fact that we are professionals and address other pros within the HR industry. Would you use that type of language during an interview with a major candidate or during a new employee orientation? How about during a professional reference interview?

Maybe you do and maybe you are really good at it. If you do and you are, please disregard this post; it wasn't meant for you anyway.

by rayannethorn

▶ Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Mat von Kroeker on October 21, 2009 at 11:53am

My mother cussed like a drunken sailor -- but was one of the most religious persons I've known-- and only drank alcohol once in her life. Her attitude was-- if the occasion warrants it? Let your freak flag fly--- and nothing kicks you in the teeth more than a 5 foot, 2 inch lady, very ticked off, giving you the @#%!!& business. Yet I agree with Jerry A.-- there a time and place for everything.

My first thought of where cussing would be used in business is three or four "old boys club" types sitting with thier scotches and cigars-- "Did you see that $#@!% game last night??!!....." :)

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Slouch on October 21, 2009 at 12:02pm

Fuck, what did I miss?

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Slouch on October 21, 2009 at 2:58pm

Sorry Karen for distracting from the original post. I thought I was keeping the spirit alive and on target. My apologies.

KarenM said:

Hmm, the post got that much more diverse.

Thanks Rayanne -and as usual, great writing skills. You have a great way of saying what is on many people's minds, but some just can't demonstrate it as well.. :)

Rayanne said:
that's pretty gratuitous, Slouch...

Slouch said:
Fuck, what did I miss?

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Joshua Letourneau on October 21, 2009 at 3:57pm

Good call, Rayanne. For me, the real risk of social media is being cursed at or insulted for having a different belief or opinion than someone else. Those that lack any intellectual capacity curse at you or throw out one-line insults because that's the depth of their ability to debate their own case. Or, if you don't prescribe to societal norms (or industry norms), you might just wind up in a social network guillotine, ala 7th grade 'popularity politics'.

I don't think any of us want to be associated with that - at least I don't.

P.S. My comment is not about having thick skin - I think anyone who posts online more than once or twice a week has likely built some up. It's about not wanting to be associated with that kind of behavior. You're right that any of our Clients could see something negative directed toward us and pull back. Conversely, they might see us engaging in a classless thread and assume that birds of a feather flock together.

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Peter Ceccarelli on October 21, 2009 at 4:48pm

Come again? I don't have a clue as to what you're implying here! WTF are you implying dear?

Sandra McCartt said:

Brits and Aussies and Zealanders and all the rest of you fokkers ( i believe that is a triplane)may swear. Texans will just give you a good ole country cussin.

Let's just all pretend that we wouldn't say chit if we had a mouthful and go on about our business talking about online what we say offline but we wouldn't say online. If that is your position you just outed yourself anyway and everybody who might see already knows you are not PC in the real world but your prefer PC in writing. Which is great if that's your preference. Like the big boys court says, "I'll know it when i see it". If you see it and it offends then say so in specific instances. Or we can spend a lifetime evaluating every word , derivitive of said work, regional slang, etc. etc.

I think When we start defining what is appropriate for others based on our own values we create a holier than thou or a nastier than thou zealot environment which is , as we say in Texas, Bullchitski. Either direction.

If it offends, take issue. If not, roll on. May be one of the few times in the history of the world that i agree with Karen.

Peter Ceccarelli said:
Unless you are authentically British, or Australian, or from New Zealand with the accent, then swearing with those accents backing it up is just fine in my book. It sounds so proper! But for some reason we Americans just can't pull that off with the same finesse. Heck, they aren't even trying for finesse, but it sure is intepreted that way. The Brits, Aussies, and New Zelanders can get away with murder when they swear because it sounds so good! Why is that? The tweed makes it less offensive?

Personally I don't think a reference to a swear word or a cultural/regional slang lessens the blow, or is better than using anything other than the F word. There can be no gray zone with this topic then and some of you want the haves and have nots. Nah! It's one way or the other. There can be no degree of acceptance on a topic like this based on the original blog content. I don't think the F word is any more offensive then the D word, or the S word, or any of the others. But we can't have our cake and eat it too.

I'm from the old time retail department store world of 2+ decades ago and everyone swore. The VP's swore, the Directors swore, the buyers swore, the quiet accountants swore, the vendors swore, the designers swore, the elevator operators swore, the switch board operator swore, hell EVERYONE swore! I miss those days. It was just fine back then. We have all become whimps and babies. So when I swear I do it with a British accent, but it's a challenging when swearing on a blog.......are there symbols one can use to denote it's British! Ideas anyone?

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Recruiting Animal on October 21, 2009 at 4:55pm

I've been trying to unfollow this discussion - but it won't unfollow.

Is anyone else having that problem?

▶ Reply

Permalink Reply by Peter Ceccarelli on October 22, 2009 at 12:22am

Blimey! You terrible sot you..........you've figured out when I do the accent whilst swearing! You're f.........ing good lady!

Sandra McCartt said:

WTF, Peter I love your british accent.

Peter Ceccarelli said:
Come again? I don't have a clue as to what you're implying here! WTF are you implying dear?

Sandra McCartt said:
Brits and Aussies and Zealanders and all the rest of you fokkers ( i believe that is a triplane)may swear. Texans will just give you a good ole country cussin.

Let's just all pretend that we wouldn't say chit if we had a mouthful and go on about our business talking about online what we say offline but we wouldn't say online. If that is your position you just outed yourself anyway and everybody who might see already knows you are not PC in the real world but your prefer PC in writing. Which is great if that's your preference. Like the big boys court says, "I'll know it when i see it". If you see it and it offends then say so in specific instances. Or we can spend a lifetime evaluating every word , derivitive of said work, regional slang, etc. etc.

I think When we start defining what is appropriate for others based on our own values we create a holier than thou or a nastier than thou zealot environment which is , as we say in Texas, Bullchitski. Either direction.

If it offends, take issue. If not, roll on. May be one of the few times in the history of the world that i agree with Karen.

Peter Ceccarelli said:
Unless you are authentically British, or Australian, or from New Zealand with the accent, then swearing with those accents backing it up is just fine in my book. It sounds so proper! But for some reason we Americans just can't pull that off with the same finesse. Heck, they aren't even trying for finesse, but it sure is intepreted that way. The Brits, Aussies, and New Zelanders can get away with murder when they swear because it sounds so good! Why is that? The tweed makes it less offensive?

Personally I don't think a reference to a swear word or a cultural/regional slang lessens the blow, or is better than using anything other than the F word. There can be no gray zone with this topic then and some of you want the haves and have nots. Nah! It's one way or the other. There can be no degree of acceptance on a topic like this based on the original blog content. I don't think the F word is any more offensive then the D word, or the S word, or any of the others. But we can't have our cake and eat it too.

I'm from the old time retail department store world of 2+ decades ago and everyone swore. The VP's swore, the Directors swore, the buyers swore, the quiet accountants swore, the vendors swore, the designers swore, the elevator operators swore, the switch board operator swore, hell EVERYONE swore! I miss those days. It was just fine back then. We have all become whimps and babies. So when I swear I do it with a British accent, but it's a challenging when swearing on a blog.......are there symbols one can use to denote it's British! Ideas anyone?