Tuesday Turn-on's first candidate is in sales... and is attached below. Thanks in advance for your comments.

If you'd know someone who would agree to a semi-anonymous public critique of their resume, let me know.


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needs more white space, reformat. Maybe bullet summery too. Ok to go to 2 pages
Remove whole qualifications section- useless

Format with OBJECTIVE as first heading, which should be the job title he/she is seeking for each submission

otherwise not too bad- with short job tenure would use last bullet in each section to discuss reasons for moving

this could be a good service for people Steve- saves a bunch of money at useless resume writing workshops when the best of the best will do it for free ;-)
Agree with others, needs more white space - too dense. Also, in the summary, break it up. So, have 1-3 lines of summary and the rest should be 4 major succinct bullet points. This is too dense to read for a recrutier. Also, start your bullets with action words. And when you quantify something, place that at the beginning of the bullet.

Hope that helps.
I would turn the qualifications summary into bulleted key accomplishments and stick to facts rather than subjective adjectives of how I view myself. It is writen like a sales pitch but we are looking at a salesperson's resume. As others have indicated the format is dense, lacks style and would benefit from redesign.

However, I believe this candidate deserves a phone call. I don't judge people whose professions are not in written communication on their resume writing skills. There is some hard statistical data in the resume that warrants further discovery through at the very least a few minutes of conversation.
Sure... i know some guy's who need helpful people like you...
Forget the format.

Where are the #'s???

For the most recent gig, they need to add rankings, revenue #'s, this is sales...People want to know they are going to hire someone who can sell, and has the documentation to prove their sales #'s.
headache inducing..

the summary at the top needs to be shortened by losing this sentence: "Background includes earning the Million Dollar Reports Silver Award for selling more than $5 million in real estate and being in the top 5% out of 100 agents in the company."

This is stated out of context..when? for whom? ..the information occurs again later, right where it should be, in the context of the work history.

The rest of the summary needs to be bullet points.
I disagree that the opening qualifiers need to be bullet pointed and stating the he's the Million Dollar Reports Silver Award winner is redundant because it comes up again. It's his opener and obviously a huge achievement so it should go there, and should be restated as sometimes repeptition is the best way to drive home a point/result if it's not over done.

The content is actually very strong, but like the others, the resume is too dense and needs more "space" so it's easier to digest. I'd certainly call this candidate if I had a opening in his arena.

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