Wednesday Wisdom: Smell the Roses

Dear Claudia,

I feel silly writing about this, but it’s come to the point that if I don’t get some advice soon, I’m gonna kill someone and plant sweet smelling flowers on his grave. Our company recently downsized and moved into a smaller office space; I now sit in a cubicle next to one of the engineers. Nice guy, very friendly (and curious about my job, which is annoying), but the real problem is that he has the worst body odor imaginable. No matter what I try, I can’t get away from the smell; it even lingers on my clothes when I go home some days. I’ve talked with my boss about it several times, and she’s had conversations with his boss, but this guy doesn’t seem to get the message. There’s no other space in the office for me to move; what should I do?

Migraine in Maine

Dear Migraine,

Can I just say this for all of the girls in the room? Ewwwwwwwwwwwwww. Sorry guys, I know there are some equally sensitive male noses out there.

It may not help to know this, but Fish4jobs did a survey in the UK last year about bad behaviors in office environments (there’s a great top 10 list to be found here); the number one complaint was poor personal hygiene, and 59% agreed that this was the worst sin an office mate could commit. Now I haven’t seen a similar poll on this side of the pond recently, but I’m going to guess that noses are pretty much the same everywhere. This situation stinks, and no pun intended.

Let’s look at your options. First, note that body odor can be attributed to factors other than poor hygiene. Do you know if that’s the case here? Consider starting with HR to confirm or rule out that possibility; would it change your perspective if you knew this engineer was trying to manage a medical condition? Understanding the truth of the situation is helpful, but at some point you really need to speak directly to him about the problem. You say he is friendly, and friendly people are generally approachable; how about a little direct, respectful conversation about the impact that the situation is having on you? Accommodation goes both ways, and you may get more out of the deal than you expected.

Knowledge is powerful, but it can’t overcome bad smells. Speak your truth – say what you need – respectfully, and give others the chance to do the same. And if that doesn’t help, I’ve been told by people responsible for cadaver removal that Vicks VapoRub, when it strategically fills the entire nose cavity, prevents even the worst smells from making you sick.

**

In my day job, I’m the Head of Products for Improved Experience, where we help employers use feedback to measure and manage competitive advantage in hiring and retention. Learn more about us here.

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Permalink Reply by Claudia Faust on January 14, 2009 at 7:18pm

Ok, this is a truly brilliant reply Dan, and thank you for chipping in. Extra Blog Reader points for you today...

Dan Nuroo said:

The scarey thing is.. having "that" conversation actually gets easier with experience... I've had them (with other people may I add, not concerning me :) ) 4 times in my career now... the first one was really awkward.. but got easier.

I promise people in our Induction process that I am going to be blunt and honest with them in regards to feedback... and then give the news to them straight (tactfully of course) but with no ambiguities.. I feel like a (insert term here) for doing it, but it is for their own good. I'd like to think no-one comes into a social or professional environment with the idea that they stink and that their odour will offend others... and if they aren't told or don't know anything about it, they cannot fix it. You are doing a disservice to the person but not saying anything.

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Permalink Reply by Dan Nuroo on January 14, 2009 at 8:34pm

Thanks Claudia.. hopefully I'll find a way to cash in the "Extra Blog reader" points... I never can find the way to cash in my "Brownie points" at home :)

Claudia Faust said:

Ok, this is a truly brilliant reply Dan, and thank you for chipping in. Extra Blog Reader points for you today...

Dan Nuroo said:
The scarey thing is.. having "that" conversation actually gets easier with experience... I've had them (with other people may I add, not concerning me :) ) 4 times in my career now... the first one was really awkward.. but got easier.

I promise people in our Induction process that I am going to be blunt and honest with them in regards to feedback... and then give the news to them straight (tactfully of course) but with no ambiguities.. I feel like a (insert term here) for doing it, but it is for their own good. I'd like to think no-one comes into a social or professional environment with the idea that they stink and that their odour will offend others... and if they aren't told or don't know anything about it, they cannot fix it. You are doing a disservice to the person but not saying anything.

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Permalink Reply by Steve Levy on January 15, 2009 at 6:58am

You are evil Claudia...I get involved and your response is to insult me????

Claudia Faust said:

Wait... did I just use "SHRM" and "Steve Levy" in the same sentence???

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Permalink Reply by Claudia Faust on January 15, 2009 at 12:11pm

Only in the sweetest possible way, Steve. hehehe.

Steve Levy said:

You are evil Claudia...I get involved and your response is to insult me????

Claudia Faust said:
Wait... did I just use "SHRM" and "Steve Levy" in the same sentence???