How Twitter Makes Liars of Us

Over the weekend, my daughter went to Disneyland with three other girls - best friends for one of the girl's fourteenth birthday. It was, kind of, a last-minute plan and the girls were excited to have some time to celebrate together and just enjoy the amusement park. As we hold annual Disneyland passes and my daughter's weekend was free, there were no real obstacles for her to overcome in order to be a part of these plans; other than a Friday night trip to the mall to pick up a gift for her friend.

One of the girls, Olivia, is very involved with a dance troupe and has weekend workouts. Her mother, at her daughter's urging, decided to let her off the hook and play hooky from dance class/practices. The mom called the instructor, falsely declaring that Olivia was ill and would not be coming into the studio on Saturday. All seemed right with the world and plans continued on for a great day and overnight celebration.

That is, until Olivia decided to send out a tweet stating her joy at going to Disneyland with her best friends. When we only think about our world, we believe it exists alone. One of Olivia's followers is a fellow dance student, who promptly told Olivia's dance instructor, that she was not sick but having a grand time at Disneyland. The instructor then promptly called the mom, unhappy with the deceit that had been spun and the skipping out of dance class that had taken place. From my understanding, Mom laughed it off.

While this is not a capital offense, by any means, it does speak to the ease in which a simple error in judgment and a misplaced lie can lead to complications, hurt feelings, and a loss of trust. Olivia is now fearful of her next visit to the studio..., will she lose her solo? will the instructor embarrass her? can she rebuild the trust? And if the answer is no, to any of these, how does she move forward from here? Again, a simple error in judgment, but a lie was told nonetheless. We will all have thoughts about who to blame...

The point of my story is that transparency lends itself to just that: transparency. And if you are not ready for transparency, maybe new media is not the place to be spending your time. I see every day, candidates tweeting regarding a horrible interview or the jerk of a hiring manager for whom they would never work. What happens in social media doesn't just stay there, it is everywhere for everyone to see. Candidates should be reminded of this and often; we all should. Cognisance. It's not just for breakfast.

© by rayannethorn

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Permalink Reply by Fran Hogan on February 1, 2010 at 7:14am

Hmmm, can't count the number of times I had a fake note for my teacher, my roller skating and softball coaches (with, but mostly without my Mom's complicity). Never had to worry about public broadcasting or tattletale classmates!!! Transparency can certainly complicate your life when you are a teenager.

However, I am continually amazed that adults have to be reminded not to post nasty @ss comments about their job, coworkers or bosses on public forums. Hello???

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Permalink Reply by Tisha Jackson on February 1, 2010 at 10:12am

Wonder why Mom decided it was necessary to lie in the 1st place?

If Mom's lie never came to light - Olivia would believe (based on Mom's actions) that lying to get out of doing something you don't want to do, is A-OK.

Totally blame Mom for putting her daughter in this position, as Adults we know better and are supposed to definitely demonstrate that knowledge in front of our kids.

I think this happening is GREAT! Life lessons to be learned from all sides.

Think of yourself as a 'commodity' and SM is your PR machine, craft your message in a way that is beneficial to YOU!

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Permalink Reply by Brian Meeks on February 1, 2010 at 12:17pm

Great post, as always. I wonder why the mother felt she needed to lie? Was the teacher a really mean dictatorial person that intimidated her? Did the mother think it was easier and would avoid beind judged? Perhaps the mother's pants were on fire?

I think it is true that 'Honesty is the Best Policy', either that, or 'Half Price Buffet for Red Heads'. The latter may be an even better policy, but I digress.

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Permalink Reply by Sandra McCartt on February 1, 2010 at 1:46pm

Maybe the title of this should be "How Liars get caught by Twittering". :)

I'm a bit brutal but if there is something i don't want to do that i have said i would do i find it easier to call the person and say, "I said i would do this ..now ..do you want the truth or do you want a BS story, I can give you either but the bottom line is I just can't want to, or i have't done it, so shoot me."

Lies have been a problem with the human condition since Eve told Adam the apple was a good thing and look what happened to them. At least Eve didn't think she wouldn't get caught because she was sitting at a computer screen flopping something out there in cyberspace. Or maybe that was the first cyberspace lie ever told.

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Permalink Reply by Thomas Patrick Chuna on February 1, 2010 at 9:35pm

Mom should've just told the dance instructor what was going on...or for that matter, the daughter should have taken on the responsibility herself..it's never too early for someone to act like a grownup. ..the kid isn't the first one to go to disneyland for gods sake, what would the instructor do, take away the kids birthday? ...I know a few instructor types - they only land on someone if the absenteeism becomes a pattern, or the kid is lazy and needs to be booted out anyway and the school needs an excuse..

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Permalink Reply by Maureen Sharib on February 3, 2010 at 7:47am

Twitter has picked up on an irresistable trait of character in human nature: the desire to spy on others. And so have the other social networks. Oh, say you don't have that trait but you do. Really, you do.