Rude Linkedin Introductions, you just sent one!

Illin' Linkedin Introductions

In the last few weeks, I feel like I suddenly got popular with all the Linkedin Introductions I have received.  Not in the “hot girl at the dance” kind of way and not in the "our company just got a billion dollar valuation" way.  Either my name is on wall in a bathroom stall or my Linkedin account hit a tipping point and has enough momentum to build on itself.

The issue I have with these Illin’ (Inconsiderate Linkedin Lazy INtro’s) Linkedin Introductions is that they arrive in the inbox with no note, no introduction, and what I feel is a lack of professionalism.  If I have known you for awhile, we just caught up and when I get back to the office I see the invite to connect, I "almost" get it, but even would it kill someone to include a “great catching up with you"?  Lately, I have been receiving a lot of invites from people I don’t know with no note, no introduction, nada.  Just the standard message that your Linkedin introductions provide:

“I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.”

For those of the Facebook generation, let me put it into perspective.  OMG!  Seriously!  That's just rude!  I don’t care how hot, popular, or rich you are, I just think it is a little assuming to show up in my inbox with no introduction or purpose and ask me for something.   It is one step removed from the pop up that you receive when on a porn sight that says something like “Lavender92 left you a message”.   Not that I would know. . . I work in HR.

Am I asking too much?  Am I old fashioned?

Linkedin introductions give professionals a great vehicle to connect, has made it super easy to reach out and touch someone and more often than not the opportunity is squandered.  Just a couple of clicks on the mouse and you have the potential to be connected.  Look mom, no typing!  But this isn’t Facebook.  This isn’t a personal and informal network for the mamarazzi.  I look at this as a platform and opportunity to show off professional chops.  I don’t want 500 connections with people I have never worked with, emailed with, or been introduced to.  I would rather have 50 quality connections that I trust, have worked with, or networked with.  If I am going to connect with someone, I want the first impression to be one that is thoughtful, shows some respect, and yes, kisses up to some extent.  I am not reaching out to you, you are reaching out to me.  Are you such a celebrity that I should be jumping at the chance to connect with you?

Does this sound familiar to your Linkedin introductions?  Show up, ask for something and assume I am going to run hither?

If you are reaching out to connect with me (and I am a nobody), is it wrong of me to ask WHY?  Is that vain of me?  I am not expecting anyone to say, “hey sexy, saw your picture on Linkedin, wanna hook up?”  But would it kill anyone to type something like:

  • Heard you speak at the recruiting event last week and wanted to reach out.  I took your advice, thanks!   Let me know if I can return the favor.
  • Saw your blog post and wanted to reach out.  Thought what you said about networking was spot on.
  • I saw that you are going to attend the Best Place to Work awards next week, and was hoping I could introduce myself there, just wanted to reach out.

The above gives me confidence that this connection may lead to something that we will both appreciate.  It leaves me all touchy - feely - goosey- bumpy and even if you are a vendor looking to get into our pants, at least I get the feeling you are trying.

Am I asking too much when I ask for 2 sentences?  Did common courtesy just pass me by?

Did technology kill professionalism and courtesy like video killed the radio star?   I just did a speaking event for a college group last week and the thank you I received was an email that said “thank for speaking” in the subject line and the body of the email was blank.  Not even a signature.  Thanks a lot buddy.

Linkedin introductions are a tool.  Just like your daddy said "Take care of the tool and the tool will take care of you."

Good Luck,

HRNasty

nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky and manipulative but with a result that can’t help but be admired.  EG: "He has a nasty forkball".

Views: 3954

Comment by Darren on May 24, 2012 at 7:39am

Worth saying that on the iphone app, when you hit "Connect" you are not given the opportunity to customize the message, it sends the default immediately - so maybe they are not to blame entirely! :)

Comment by Christopher Perez on May 24, 2012 at 7:45am

Very good point, Darren. I stand educated. I don't use the iPhone app for connecting as a rule, but I may have done that myself in the past.

Comment by Nigel Coxon on January 10, 2013 at 8:55am

One thing to consider is the root cause of the problem. We all want something out of Linkedin but need the initial contact to do that. Linkedin makes it hard because it's not really an "introduction" service - in theory to connect, you should already have been introduced.

I'll admit I've used the "we've done business together" option - but then I will ALWAYS put in the text something to the effect of "actually I'd LIKE to do business with you" and an explanation of why.

Secondly, I think most of these "no info" connections come from the "People you may know" section...it's the one area of the site where if you click "Connect", you don't get any sort of popup to enter any text. Linkedin is full of inconsistencies!

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