Rude Linkedin Introductions, you just sent one!

Illin' Linkedin Introductions

In the last few weeks, I feel like I suddenly got popular with all the Linkedin Introductions I have received. Not in the “hot girl at the dance” kind of way and not in the "our company just got a billion dollar valuation" way. Either my name is on wall in a bathroom stall or my Linkedin account hit a tipping point and has enough momentum to build on itself.

The issue I have with these Illin’ (Inconsiderate Linkedin Lazy INtro’s) Linkedin Introductions is that they arrive in the inbox with no note, no introduction, and what I feel is a lack of professionalism. If I have known you for awhile, we just caught up and when I get back to the office I see the invite to connect, I "almost" get it, but even would it kill someone to include a “great catching up with you"? Lately, I have been receiving a lot of invites from people I don’t know with no note, no introduction, nada. Just the standard message that your Linkedin introductions provide:

“I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn.”

For those of the Facebook generation, let me put it into perspective. OMG! Seriously! That's just rude! I don’t care how hot, popular, or rich you are, I just think it is a little assuming to show up in my inbox with no introduction or purpose and ask me for something. It is one step removed from the pop up that you receive when on a porn sight that says something like “Lavender92 left you a message”. Not that I would know. . . I work in HR.

Am I asking too much? Am I old fashioned?

Linkedin introductions give professionals a great vehicle to connect, has made it super easy to reach out and touch someone and more often than not the opportunity is squandered. Just a couple of clicks on the mouse and you have the potential to be connected. Look mom, no typing! But this isn’t Facebook. This isn’t a personal and informal network for the mamarazzi. I look at this as a platform and opportunity to show off professional chops. I don’t want 500 connections with people I have never worked with, emailed with, or been introduced to. I would rather have 50 quality connections that I trust, have worked with, or networked with. If I am going to connect with someone, I want the first impression to be one that is thoughtful, shows some respect, and yes, kisses up to some extent. I am not reaching out to you, you are reaching out to me. Are you such a celebrity that I should be jumping at the chance to connect with you?

Does this sound familiar to your Linkedin introductions? Show up, ask for something and assume I am going to run hither?

If you are reaching out to connect with me (and I am a nobody), is it wrong of me to ask WHY? Is that vain of me? I am not expecting anyone to say, “hey sexy, saw your picture on Linkedin, wanna hook up?” But would it kill anyone to type something like:

Heard you speak at the recruiting event last week and wanted to reach out. I took your advice, thanks! Let me know if I can return the favor.
Saw your blog post and wanted to reach out. Thought what you said about networking was spot on.
I saw that you are going to attend the Best Place to Work awards next week, and was hoping I could introduce myself there, just wanted to reach out.

The above gives me confidence that this connection may lead to something that we will both appreciate. It leaves me all touchy - feely - goosey- bumpy and even if you are a vendor looking to get into our pants, at least I get the feeling you are trying.

Am I asking too much when I ask for 2 sentences? Did common courtesy just pass me by?

Did technology kill professionalism and courtesy like video killed the radio star? I just did a speaking event for a college group last week and the thank you I received was an email that said “thank for speaking” in the subject line and the body of the email was blank. Not even a signature. Thanks a lot buddy.

Linkedin introductions are a tool. Just like your daddy said "Take care of the tool and the tool will take care of you."

Good Luck,

HRNasty

nasty: an unreal maneuver of incredible technique, something that is ridiculously good, tricky and manipulative but with a result that can’t help but be admired. EG: "He has a nasty forkball".

Comment by Julia Briggs on May 17, 2012 at 11:35am: Spot on. LI is used by people in many different ways but if you are of the 'my connections are my brand' school of thought and believe it is important to really know them and be able to vouch for them, the shoddy unfocused approach really won't cut it.

What really stuns me is that I am recommended to people who have been made redundant and want to think about an interim/independent career. So they send me the bland link - sometimes as a friend. And then wonder why I am not all over them like a cheap suit. They've fallen at the first hurdle of being an independent. And a considerate human being.

Comment by Rochelle Kaplan on May 17, 2012 at 12:04pm: Thanks, HRNasty, you've succinctly nailed this one!

Comment by HRNasty on May 17, 2012 at 12:23pm: Wow, thanks for all the support. Amy, AKA Mama Grizzly AKA Big Sis, first one out the gate and on the west coast no less. Thank you! Glad you said it first, because I am also "ignoring" people. Rude but we have to protect our networks which as folks in HR and recruiters is our reputation!

Celinda, you summed it up perfectly. You would think that a on line connection couldn't make this much noise, but fingernails on a chalkboard sums it up perfectly!

Comment by HRNasty on May 17, 2012 at 12:26pm: Christopher,

thanks for the support on this. I agree, when we are in professional groups a little "professional courtesy" can be extended, but 10 seconds isn't too much to ask. If I get a blank invite, I used to say "thanks for reaching out". . . and then offer any help I can. . . but after receiving even no response from that. . . "fo-gitt-about-dit!"

Comment by HRNasty on May 17, 2012 at 12:26pm: Christopher,

thanks for the support on this. I agree, when we are in professional groups a little "professional courtesy" can be extended, but 10 seconds isn't too much to ask. If I get a blank invite, I used to say "thanks for reaching out". . . and then offer any help I can. . . but after receiving even no response from that. . . "fo-gitt-about-dit!"

Comment by HRNasty on May 17, 2012 at 12:28pm: Sandra,

thanks for the comments! I haven't gotten the Elephant Trainer in Alaska yet, but at this point I wouldn't say to anyone "don't hold your breath". It is probably right around the corner. I agree, these are on the verge of "spam". Thanks for the support!

Comment by HRNasty on May 17, 2012 at 12:30pm: Doctor Raghavan,

Thanks for the insight. I haven't been clicking on these much lately. . . but it makes sense. . . anything for a quick buck these days. This makes a lot of sense. . . If they were smart, they would have pictures of more attractive "recruiters" on these profile pictures. LOL Thank you!

Comment by HRNasty on May 17, 2012 at 12:34pm: Julia,

you are talking my language! "Shoddy unfocused approach won't cut it" and they wonder "why I am not all over them like a cheap suit". As someone who is recruiting. . . my view of the world may be a little distorted, but I tend to look at most people I meet with a "would I hire them or decline them" attitude. "they have fallen at the first hurdle".

Thanks for the support!

Comment by HRNasty on May 17, 2012 at 12:34pm: Rochelle, just call me the Hammer! Thanks for the comments, much appreciated!

Comment by Rochelle Kaplan on May 17, 2012 at 12:40pm: I almost thought I was the only one receiving these rude invitations. Some of them actually inferred that we worked together in the past!!! NOT!

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